better
Wow, do I feel better. It’s like that balance beam has been replaced by a wide, rolling prairie and the winds are calm.
I apologized to Deni & Mel for acting so strangely. They were cool about it – “we all have our rough patches” – but they wish I’d share with them what was going on. Real friends tell each other things. I told them that I had a bad reaction to some ‘behavioral medicine’, and implied that my parents were fighting.
I wonder if I’ll ever stop lying. But I just can’t tell my friends that I’m dependent on an illegal/illicit drug and will be for the rest of my life. Not that they’d rat me or my parents out. I just don’t think they’d believe me. And I’d rather actually be a liar than be thought one.
I didn’t see Corbett today, but he’s got a hug coming his way when I do. One of these days I’ll get up the courage to call him.
So I’m on this UNR34 for the rest of my life. But it won’t be so bad. I only need it every once in a while now, and Aunt T@mmi3 will show me how she makes her mixtures. She says she’s got enough of it to last me about 50 years.
I can never go to a doctor, but I’ve got Aunt T@mmi3, and when she gets too old she’ll pass on her knowledge to another friend of the family. I can’t have kids, of course, but I knew that already.
I do wonder what having all that UNR34 in my system for so many years has done to me, though. Maybe it’s where my paintings come from. And maybe my dreams are all memories of the trips I’ve taken.
Who knows?
I wish my parents would trust me a little more, stop trying to protect me from everything. If they’d just told me the truth I wouldn’t have gone through all this. Maybe this episode has taught them something.
But I doubt it.
DanneR
Song Stuck In My Head: “Trust”, by Megadeth
I apologized to Deni & Mel for acting so strangely. They were cool about it – “we all have our rough patches” – but they wish I’d share with them what was going on. Real friends tell each other things. I told them that I had a bad reaction to some ‘behavioral medicine’, and implied that my parents were fighting.
I wonder if I’ll ever stop lying. But I just can’t tell my friends that I’m dependent on an illegal/illicit drug and will be for the rest of my life. Not that they’d rat me or my parents out. I just don’t think they’d believe me. And I’d rather actually be a liar than be thought one.
I didn’t see Corbett today, but he’s got a hug coming his way when I do. One of these days I’ll get up the courage to call him.
So I’m on this UNR34 for the rest of my life. But it won’t be so bad. I only need it every once in a while now, and Aunt T@mmi3 will show me how she makes her mixtures. She says she’s got enough of it to last me about 50 years.
I can never go to a doctor, but I’ve got Aunt T@mmi3, and when she gets too old she’ll pass on her knowledge to another friend of the family. I can’t have kids, of course, but I knew that already.
I do wonder what having all that UNR34 in my system for so many years has done to me, though. Maybe it’s where my paintings come from. And maybe my dreams are all memories of the trips I’ve taken.
Who knows?
I wish my parents would trust me a little more, stop trying to protect me from everything. If they’d just told me the truth I wouldn’t have gone through all this. Maybe this episode has taught them something.
But I doubt it.
DanneR
Song Stuck In My Head: “Trust”, by Megadeth
posted by DanneR at 8:14 PM
1 Comments:
If it hasn't taught them anything, it's up to YOU to teach them. You are the only one living both sides of the situation.
Post a Comment
<< Home